Carol Bates, a woman who's visited our church for the last several months and studied on Tuesday afternoons with yours truly, was baptized tonight. After the pre-baptism instruction, a few nervous jokes, one powerful confession, the actual baptism, a few prayers from friends a reading from the New Testament, Carol looked at me and said, "You asked me if I believed that Jesus was the son of God."
Yes, I remembered asking her this question as it happened approximately 90 seconds previously.
A pause ensued. I didn't know what would come next. After all, Carol and I had discussed many elements of faith (suffering, incarnation, hope, Israel) in our Tuesday study time. Was she regretting her decision already? Was she unsure?
She calmed my ill-founded fears in the next breath.
"Well . . . it's taken me my whole life to be able to answer that question. Seriously. My whole life. My answer is yes. Josh, my answer is yes."
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Last Sunday, Andrew, a young adult from our church, was also baptized. He read a powerful statement of faith to the entire gathered community. He was a little nervous being under the watchful eye of so many. Plus, his entire family was present. But he spoke powerfully of the necessity to make this public declaration.
After his baptism he squeezed me so hard I thought all the blood in my body was going to push up to my head. Lukcily, I survived with all my motor skills in proper working fashion.
I think baptism is the greatest confession. It doesn't make a whole lot of sense. I mean, letting someone hold you under water in front of a room full of people. Now, that's faith.
29 February 2008
One Master Writer
I consider Anne Lamott to be one of the best spiritual writers of our day. Traveling Mercies, Plan B, and Bird by Bird have been great models of spiritual writing done well while avoiding the pitfalls of fundamentalism (that tends to use religious words the way a bowler smokes cigarettes) and liberalism (avoiding sacred words at all costs so that faith becomes the psychological equivalent of "differentiation.")
"I wish I had a secret I could let you in on, some formula my father passed on to me in a whisper just before he died, some code word that has enabled me to sit at my desk and land flights of creative inspiration like and air-traffic controller. But I don’t. All I know is that the process is pretty much the same for almost everyone I know. The good news is that some days it feels like you just have to keep getting out of your own way to write it. It is a little like when you have something difficult to discuss with someone, and as you go to do it, you hope and pray that the right words will come if only you show up and make a stab at it. And often the right words do come, and you—well—“write” for a while; you put a lot of thoughts down on paper. But the bad news is that if you’re at all like me, you’ll probably read over what you’ve written and spend the rest of the day obsessing, and praying that you do not die before you can completely rewrite or destroy what you have written, lest the eagerly waiting world learn how bad your first drafts are." From Anne Lamott in Bird by Bird, pg. 7-8
28 February 2008
Upside Down Leadership
If you want to be a viable Christian leader in the emerging postmodern world you have no other option than to practice what you preach. The days of Star Search Leadership (when people followed because the leader was slick or dynamic) are dead. And that's a good thing.
Period.
Some churches are led by ministers/leaders who do not consistently put themselves in risky “scenarios”—their intellectual faith might be strong, but the embodiment of said faith is non-existent. And, at last, Christians and non-Christians alike are calling their bluff.
Myself and several college students/young adults from Rochester College and Rochester Church of Christ will spend our time: working with a diverse church (Hope Community Church), volunteering in shelters, attending worship gatherings with diverse groups of believers, hearing lectures/presentations on the history and “world” of Detroit, social class simulations, museums, one underground railroad visit, repairing homes, Love Feast in Cass Park (our normal tradition), tutoring for students, reading, journaling, hosting a music conference, sleeping in shelters, living among the homeless in Hart Plaza and hosting a basketball tourney with a local church (you know who’s excited about that).
These are some of the things we’ll be engaged in throughout our stay.
This is an urban spiritual formation retreat. The focus is on the spiritual development of those who’ve given their week to hear the rhythms of Jesus’ teaching and how they intersect with the rhythms of life in a complicated city like
This is the third urban spiritual formation trip I’ve led. The last two were hosted in the
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26 February 2008
Will the Real Jesus Please Stand Up?
In, Brian D. McLaren’s A Generous Orthodoxy, written a few years back, he sketches the “seven different depictions of Jesus in his faith journey.” On page 64, he includes this summary:
1. Conservative Protestant: The human race is guilty of sin therefore Jesus’ death pays the full penalty for human sin.
2. Pentecostal: The human race is held down by disease and poverty. Jesus teaches us to receive miracles and healings from God through faith in God’s promises.
3. Roman Catholic: The human race is enslaved by the fear of death. Jesus’ resurrection defeats death and liberates humanity.
4. Eastern Orthodox: The human race is spiritually sick and needs healing; it has dropped out of the “dance” of creation. Jesus’ entry (or incarnation) into humanity and history brings God’s healing to the human race and all of creation.
5. Liberal Protestant: The human race suffers from ignorance of the teachings and ways of Christ. Jesus’ example and teachings inspire us to work compassionately for social justice.
6. Anabaptist: The human race is divided and violent and needs to learn the ways of Christ in community. Jesus convenes a learning community of disciples who seek to model lives of love and peace.
7. Liberation (nonviolent): Humanity is oppressed by corrupt powers, systems and regimes. Jesus commissions and leads bands of activists to confront unjust regimes and make room for the Shalom of God.
Growing up, I saw Jesus as #1. In High School, because I lived in suburban Detroit, I began to appreciate #3. My first two years of college were all about #2. My last years of undergrad and first year of seminary were focused on Jesus #5. Second year of seminary was #6. The last year of seminary was #7. For the last three years, I've been preaching and (attempting) living out a combination of Jesus #7, #4.
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I don't think any one version or emphasis is necessarily "better" than the other. In fact, I don't think I would've appreciated Liberation Jesus had I not been raised in a family that worshipped Jesus #1.
Which Jesus do you currently subscribe to? Which one would you like to learn more about? Is there one that you deem "heresy"?
23 February 2008
Shaun Hover
Serving a local church if full of failure and success. In fact, the failures often seem to outnumber the success stories by a good margin.
When God does get a hold of a persons life, it's important to share those stories. In less than 8 months, Shaun Hover went from local skateboard legend with no purpose, drifting through life to local skateboard legend sharing the ancient story of God with the people of China.
Above are some pictures of Shaun's recent missionary journey to China. To read two posts I've written about Shaun click here and here. Tomorrow, Shaun will lead our church to Christ's table for the Lord's Supper, reminding all of us, that the story of Jesus is good news for everyone.
22 February 2008
Praying for Kenya
A dear friend of mine, Henry Oyer, sent this to me earlier in the week. Henry is a leader in our local church, with an incredible kingdom perspective. Henry is from Nairobi, Kenya. To read more about what's happening in Kenya, click here.
Jambo!
Most of you are familiar with the situation on inKenya Kenya
I will never forget the sadness and uncertainty I saw on the people's eyes there. Here I was, with my ticket heading back and the plane was leaving in a few hours. It was tough and still is. I think of everyone at home, I spend so sometimes trying to reach them but the phone would be ringing some but no one will pick it up. When I wake up in the morning I don't hear gun shots like I did inNairobi 7 o'clock news at night in Kenya Somalia Ethiopia Sudan
You all have probably heard that the government and opposition are working with the former UN secretary general - Kofi Annan to come up with a solution to end the violence. Both parties (government & opposition) appointed 4 members to represent them at the Kofi Annan's mediation group. Whatever they discuss in this meeting, they are therefore to go back and discuss with their parties and agree before coming back to the Annan's group and move forward. This last week Kofi Annan proposed a coalition government that will include the opposition to be part of the government. The mediator’s argument is that the government will not be able to run any business since it is a minority party in the parliament. The opposition won most of the seats in the parliament. Meeting continues this next week. The opposition felt cheated on the vote counting. They are working on a transitional government so that in 2 yrs from now, the country will go for a general election.
There is still hope; especially if the opposition agrees to be part of the government that they feel was unconstitutionally formed. Let’s keep praying that the lord will humble both parties and put the Kenyan people first and not their own interests.
Jambo!
Most of you are familiar with the situation on in
I will never forget the sadness and uncertainty I saw on the people's eyes there. Here I was, with my ticket heading back and the plane was leaving in a few hours. It was tough and still is. I think of everyone at home, I spend so sometimes trying to reach them but the phone would be ringing some but no one will pick it up. When I wake up in the morning I don't hear gun shots like I did in
You all have probably heard that the government and opposition are working with the former UN secretary general - Kofi Annan to come up with a solution to end the violence. Both parties (government & opposition) appointed 4 members to represent them at the Kofi Annan's mediation group. Whatever they discuss in this meeting, they are therefore to go back and discuss with their parties and agree before coming back to the Annan's group and move forward. This last week Kofi Annan proposed a coalition government that will include the opposition to be part of the government. The mediator’s argument is that the government will not be able to run any business since it is a minority party in the parliament. The opposition won most of the seats in the parliament. Meeting continues this next week. The opposition felt cheated on the vote counting. They are working on a transitional government so that in 2 yrs from now, the country will go for a general election.
There is still hope; especially if the opposition agrees to be part of the government that they feel was unconstitutionally formed. Let’s keep praying that the lord will humble both parties and put the Kenyan people first and not their own interests.
19 February 2008
Skateboarding for Jesus
Yesterday, a local Metro Detroit skateboard legend, Shaun Hover, stepped off of a plane from
I’ll never the forget the day he called to tell me. I was speaking at a leadership retreat at a monastery not far from
“Shaun, this is Josh.”
“Yeah?”
“What’s wrong?”
“Dude. Relax. I just wanted to let you know I want to get baptized.”
“Oh.” My heart settled back to where it was supposed to be.
17 February 2008
14 February 2008
12 February 2008
Speaking Jesus (Out of Both Sides of Your Mouth)
Part of the focus of my doctoral studies at Columbia deals with the way language shapes reality, truth, and experience. Much of my reading so far explores this topic in relation to White and African-American Communities.
For instance, students are taught in Communication 101, that the first rule of public speaking is to know your audience. The second rule, then, is to speak in a way your audience can understand without compromising your material, and objective.
I find this fascinating. It takes great skill to communicate to a white affluent church as well as a road rally in Cass Park, Detroit. It takes intentional reflection and practice to walk into a public high school and effectively speak as it does to conduct a funeral for a family of first generation Americans. I recently did a funeral for a young man whose entire family comprised of artists. I had to figure out how to communicate in a way that spoke the truth of God’s mercy and justice to them . . . not to the accountants and engineers in the room.
Our world has changed. It isn’t that our world is changing for the world has come to us. Every nation, tribe, race, culture can be found all around us. If we are serious about being people who speak a word of grace, we’d better pay attention to the ones we are speaking with.
We must be able to speak to/with people according in a matter than connects and sparks the imagination. This doesn’t mean one is being “fake”—quite the opposite. To speak to people in a way that allows them access to what you are saying authenticates their story, experience, and plight. It is affirming and honorable.
There is biblical precedent for this. Paul once wrote, “Though I am free and belong to no man, I make myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible. To the Jews I became like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law I became like one under the law (though I myself am not under the law), so as to win those under the law. To those not having the law I became like one not having the law (though I am not free from God's law but am under Christ's law), so as to win those not having the law. To the weak I became weak, to win the weak. I have become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save some. I do all this for the sake of the gospel that I may share in its blessings.”
Jesus had an amazing ability to communiate to the elite (Pharisees, Herodians, Sadducees) as well as the ones who found themselves on the fringe (parables and personal accounts shared with sinners, tax collectors, sick, diseased, and divorced).
If you are interested in this discussion (which, by the way, relates to teachers, loan officers, insurance salespersons, nurses, lawyers, doctors, as well as ministers) Henry Mitchell has written a fine essay entitled, “Black English”—it’s been used in reading and communication textbooks all over the United States.
For instance, students are taught in Communication 101, that the first rule of public speaking is to know your audience. The second rule, then, is to speak in a way your audience can understand without compromising your material, and objective.
I find this fascinating. It takes great skill to communicate to a white affluent church as well as a road rally in Cass Park, Detroit. It takes intentional reflection and practice to walk into a public high school and effectively speak as it does to conduct a funeral for a family of first generation Americans. I recently did a funeral for a young man whose entire family comprised of artists. I had to figure out how to communicate in a way that spoke the truth of God’s mercy and justice to them . . . not to the accountants and engineers in the room.
Our world has changed. It isn’t that our world is changing for the world has come to us. Every nation, tribe, race, culture can be found all around us. If we are serious about being people who speak a word of grace, we’d better pay attention to the ones we are speaking with.
We must be able to speak to/with people according in a matter than connects and sparks the imagination. This doesn’t mean one is being “fake”—quite the opposite. To speak to people in a way that allows them access to what you are saying authenticates their story, experience, and plight. It is affirming and honorable.
There is biblical precedent for this. Paul once wrote, “Though I am free and belong to no man, I make myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible. To the Jews I became like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law I became like one under the law (though I myself am not under the law), so as to win those under the law. To those not having the law I became like one not having the law (though I am not free from God's law but am under Christ's law), so as to win those not having the law. To the weak I became weak, to win the weak. I have become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save some. I do all this for the sake of the gospel that I may share in its blessings.”
Jesus had an amazing ability to communiate to the elite (Pharisees, Herodians, Sadducees) as well as the ones who found themselves on the fringe (parables and personal accounts shared with sinners, tax collectors, sick, diseased, and divorced).
If you are interested in this discussion (which, by the way, relates to teachers, loan officers, insurance salespersons, nurses, lawyers, doctors, as well as ministers) Henry Mitchell has written a fine essay entitled, “Black English”—it’s been used in reading and communication textbooks all over the United States.
10 February 2008
Winzell
Last night, just before going to bed, Kara and I watched the local news. That's part of our normal routine. Channel 4 (NBC). 11 p.m. Pretty much every night.
Unless Anderson Cooper has something interesting going on.
One of the leading stories focused attention on the plight of homeless men and women throughout Detroit on this unusually cold Saturday night (it got down to 0 degrees; with the wind chill, negative twenty degrees).
The reporter, rather excited for such a gloomy piece, interviewed a man. His name is Winzell Jarrell. The reporter (nor the TV screen) did not indicate this. But I knew who it was. I've known Winzell for almost a year now. I can't believe he's still alive. Honestly.
Winzell, and hundreds of other homeless citizens , defy the odds. I don't know how they do it. I really don't. I'd jump off a bridge.
Needless to say, I was messed up after seeing my friend on television. I woke up six or seven times last night from a deep sleep. Partly because it was just one of those nights. Partly because Winzell doesn't have a home.
09 February 2008
Daughters
father's be good to your daughters
daughters will live like you do
girls become lovers
who turn into mothers
so mothers be good
to your daughters to
Last night, Kara and decided to spend our Friday night at the health club, getting’ a little work out in. Last night, at the health club, was also the annual “Daddy-Daughter” Valentine’s Dance.
There were a few hundred Dad’s and Daughter’s covering two small basketball courts. It was a sight to behold. Dad’s dressed up in their best suits, on the dance floor with their young daughter(s). Daughters who'd wouldn't want to be anywhere else than right where they were. Hair all done up. Corsage on the wrist. The color pink abounding. Little girls believing they were Cinderella, or Snow White; some kind of princess to be sure.
So much of my time working with college students is undoing or bringing healing to the wounds caused in the lives of young people by their parents. Wounds that are the result of Christian homes as much as non-Christian homes. In fact, sometimes the aftermath of growing up Christian (especially the fundamentalist stripe) is worse for there is no more dangerous combination than legalism, hypocrisy, guilt, and shame, mixed with religion.
If we are going to change the world, one good friend likes to say . . . we’d better first start by loving the family given to us by God.
daughters will live like you do
girls become lovers
who turn into mothers
so mothers be good
to your daughters to
Last night, Kara and decided to spend our Friday night at the health club, getting’ a little work out in. Last night, at the health club, was also the annual “Daddy-Daughter” Valentine’s Dance.
There were a few hundred Dad’s and Daughter’s covering two small basketball courts. It was a sight to behold. Dad’s dressed up in their best suits, on the dance floor with their young daughter(s). Daughters who'd wouldn't want to be anywhere else than right where they were. Hair all done up. Corsage on the wrist. The color pink abounding. Little girls believing they were Cinderella, or Snow White; some kind of princess to be sure.
So much of my time working with college students is undoing or bringing healing to the wounds caused in the lives of young people by their parents. Wounds that are the result of Christian homes as much as non-Christian homes. In fact, sometimes the aftermath of growing up Christian (especially the fundamentalist stripe) is worse for there is no more dangerous combination than legalism, hypocrisy, guilt, and shame, mixed with religion.
If we are going to change the world, one good friend likes to say . . . we’d better first start by loving the family given to us by God.
07 February 2008
Priceless (v.2)
Reading a great novel on your day off: $19.95 (price of the book).
Eating two huge bowls of cereal ($4.95).
Finishing writing an exam: one headache.
Getting beat by your wife in Phase 10: one trip to the kitchen to make ice cream.
Going to the shooting range with your father and father-in-law: priceless. To read a bit about that, click here.
Eating two huge bowls of cereal ($4.95).
Finishing writing an exam: one headache.
Getting beat by your wife in Phase 10: one trip to the kitchen to make ice cream.
Going to the shooting range with your father and father-in-law: priceless. To read a bit about that, click here.
06 February 2008
Super Tuesday, There Will Be Blood, Lent
Things get real interesting now.
Hillary and Obama are in for a "heavy-weight" fight. Many so-called experts are giving Obama the edge, but I don't buy it. Hillary isn't going away that easily . . . If Hillary gets the nomination, I don't know if I could vote for her.
McCain, now likely to get the Republican nod, is creating all kinds of waves within the more conservative wing of the party. One friend pointed out this article to me recently--Rush Limbaugh is now saying he'd rather have a Democrat in office than McCain. This is better than anything else on television.
I guess I'll have to change my election final four in the left-hand column.
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In other news, I watched There Will Be Blood (Daniel Day-Lewis) last night with a group of friends. No, I did not go to this movie to off-set the recent Chick Flick-Gate. I was sincerely interested in the plot and I was not disappointed. The film is a great comparison of two opportunists--one a pastor, the other an "oil man." Both are relentless in their thirst for power, money, and influence. Besides a rather weak ending, this movie deserves Oscar considerations.
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Lenten Season is upon us. A time to focus on the things that distract us from encountering God in our daily lives. Some people give up chocolate. Some abstain from sports, gambling, drinking, and the consumption of specific foods. Last year, I gave up Dr. Pepper (a harder task than I thought it would be). This year, I'm working on my speech: I want to speak only that which love requires. I want to avoid the occasional cuss word, cynical remarks, and negative "put-downs" (my sixth grade teacher, Mrs. Cizmas, used to say, "NO killer statements").
I have a feeling that giving up Dr. Pepper will prove to be an easier mountain to scale than the one I've selected.
Hillary and Obama are in for a "heavy-weight" fight. Many so-called experts are giving Obama the edge, but I don't buy it. Hillary isn't going away that easily . . . If Hillary gets the nomination, I don't know if I could vote for her.
McCain, now likely to get the Republican nod, is creating all kinds of waves within the more conservative wing of the party. One friend pointed out this article to me recently--Rush Limbaugh is now saying he'd rather have a Democrat in office than McCain. This is better than anything else on television.
I guess I'll have to change my election final four in the left-hand column.
---------
In other news, I watched There Will Be Blood (Daniel Day-Lewis) last night with a group of friends. No, I did not go to this movie to off-set the recent Chick Flick-Gate. I was sincerely interested in the plot and I was not disappointed. The film is a great comparison of two opportunists--one a pastor, the other an "oil man." Both are relentless in their thirst for power, money, and influence. Besides a rather weak ending, this movie deserves Oscar considerations.
----------
Lenten Season is upon us. A time to focus on the things that distract us from encountering God in our daily lives. Some people give up chocolate. Some abstain from sports, gambling, drinking, and the consumption of specific foods. Last year, I gave up Dr. Pepper (a harder task than I thought it would be). This year, I'm working on my speech: I want to speak only that which love requires. I want to avoid the occasional cuss word, cynical remarks, and negative "put-downs" (my sixth grade teacher, Mrs. Cizmas, used to say, "NO killer statements").
I have a feeling that giving up Dr. Pepper will prove to be an easier mountain to scale than the one I've selected.
01 February 2008
Chick Flick
What constitutes a Chick Flick?
I taught at our mid-week service recently on being “in the world, but not of it.” At one point I used the film Chocolat as an example of different ways of engaging culture. The two main characters, the Comte and Vianne, provide a rich example of the difference between religion and spirituality. (NOTE: I’m using those two words as they’ve emerged in our current postmodern lexicon).
At lunch this week, some of my fellow staff members (Patrick, Dana, and Chris) suggested that this film is of the proverbial “Chick Flick” genre. And an ensuing assault upon my masculinity occurred. I'm over it. Really. I am.
I disagreed vehemently.
During the teaching time under consideration, I asked the church “Who’s seen this film?” About a hundred hands went up—of the hundred, approximately eighty-five were women.
Afterwards, a few men came up and said, “Hey, Josh. We’re going to see 27 Dresses at 9:45 p.m.—want to come?”
So, I’m asking you . . .the educated, savvy cultural aficianado—what are the criteria that must be present for a film to be labeled “Chick Flick"?
I taught at our mid-week service recently on being “in the world, but not of it.” At one point I used the film Chocolat as an example of different ways of engaging culture. The two main characters, the Comte and Vianne, provide a rich example of the difference between religion and spirituality. (NOTE: I’m using those two words as they’ve emerged in our current postmodern lexicon).
At lunch this week, some of my fellow staff members (Patrick, Dana, and Chris) suggested that this film is of the proverbial “Chick Flick” genre. And an ensuing assault upon my masculinity occurred. I'm over it. Really. I am.
I disagreed vehemently.
During the teaching time under consideration, I asked the church “Who’s seen this film?” About a hundred hands went up—of the hundred, approximately eighty-five were women.
Afterwards, a few men came up and said, “Hey, Josh. We’re going to see 27 Dresses at 9:45 p.m.—want to come?”
So, I’m asking you . . .the educated, savvy cultural aficianado—what are the criteria that must be present for a film to be labeled “Chick Flick"?
31 January 2008
Kwame's Confession
The Mayor of Detroit, Kwame Kilpatrick, made a public confession last night for all of Detroit to experience. Below is an excerpt from the transcript. What do you make of it? To read the entire transcript go to FREEP.COM. I took out Carlita's (Kwame's wife) comments.
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KWAME KILPATRICK: Good evening, Detroit. I want to start tonight by saying to the citizens of this great city, I'm sorry.
To all of you who have believed in what we've been doing here since 2002, to all of you who have believed in me, in my leadership, to all of you who have stuck with me through very difficult times, to all of you who prayed for me: I'm sorry.
For the embarrassment and the disappointment the events of the past few days have caused you, for what you as my supporters, many of you, have had to hear as you traveled around our city to beauty shops and barbershops, what you had to hear when you were in church this past Sunday from people who know that you have supported me.
For those of you who have not always been Kwame Kilpatrick supporters, but who lift up our city, who live in our city, who support this town in various ways, I truly apologize to each and every one of you individually and to the whole city.
Most of all tonight, I want to make a public apology to my entire family, and specifically to the four people who I love the most in this world.
First, I want to apologize to my sons, Jelani, Jalil and Jonas. For the first time in my life, I had to have a conversation with my 12-year-old twin sons about very grown-up things. It was, without a doubt, the hardest conversation that I've ever had in my entire life.
Finally, and most importantly, I want to make a public apology to my wife, Carlita, who I fell in love with when I was 19 years old. We decided to build a family together, and we did that.
Our marriage has not been perfect, but it has been great. Now, I put her in a situation which many couples deal with in the privacy of their own homes, but in our case, it's on the front page of the newspaper. This dynamic, strong, caring woman has been forced to go through this very difficult experience because of me. I truly apologize to you.
As many of you know, I'm not the type of person who displays my emotions in public, but I have to tell you I've felt more emotion in the last week than I have in the past 20 years. I've been truly hurting. I've been hurting because I know that many of you are hurting. And most of all, I've been hurting because I know my family is hurting. And I'm responsible for that.
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KWAME KILPATRICK: Good evening, Detroit. I want to start tonight by saying to the citizens of this great city, I'm sorry.
To all of you who have believed in what we've been doing here since 2002, to all of you who have believed in me, in my leadership, to all of you who have stuck with me through very difficult times, to all of you who prayed for me: I'm sorry.
For the embarrassment and the disappointment the events of the past few days have caused you, for what you as my supporters, many of you, have had to hear as you traveled around our city to beauty shops and barbershops, what you had to hear when you were in church this past Sunday from people who know that you have supported me.
For those of you who have not always been Kwame Kilpatrick supporters, but who lift up our city, who live in our city, who support this town in various ways, I truly apologize to each and every one of you individually and to the whole city.
Most of all tonight, I want to make a public apology to my entire family, and specifically to the four people who I love the most in this world.
First, I want to apologize to my sons, Jelani, Jalil and Jonas. For the first time in my life, I had to have a conversation with my 12-year-old twin sons about very grown-up things. It was, without a doubt, the hardest conversation that I've ever had in my entire life.
Finally, and most importantly, I want to make a public apology to my wife, Carlita, who I fell in love with when I was 19 years old. We decided to build a family together, and we did that.
Our marriage has not been perfect, but it has been great. Now, I put her in a situation which many couples deal with in the privacy of their own homes, but in our case, it's on the front page of the newspaper. This dynamic, strong, caring woman has been forced to go through this very difficult experience because of me. I truly apologize to you.
As many of you know, I'm not the type of person who displays my emotions in public, but I have to tell you I've felt more emotion in the last week than I have in the past 20 years. I've been truly hurting. I've been hurting because I know that many of you are hurting. And most of all, I've been hurting because I know my family is hurting. And I'm responsible for that.
29 January 2008
Fresno and Phil
The Fresno ZOE Conference was a great event. The College Church of Christ has become a special place of rest, friendship, and family for me these last two years.
I returned from Fresno late Sunday night (Monday morning) . . . well . . . late for me . . . 3 a.m. As I was driving from the airport home, I thought, there’s one person I can call right now that would not shoot me: my dad.
For the last twenty-plus years, my dad has worked the midnight shift at Children’s Hospital as a respiratory therapist. In fact, when I was younger, he worked two jobs—always the midnight shift.
I have many friends who lament that “my dad never made time for me” or “my dad was great with everyone except his own family.” I empathize with these people . . . but I cannot relate.
My father was always around. He was always there. Always present. Always willing to play catch, go for a jog, watch hoops, play one-on-one.
From seventh to twelfth grade he (nor my mom) never missed one sporting/church event. We played football, baseball, soccer, basketball and tennis and he was there for every single game. Of course, the post-game “Dad-nalysis” was part of the experience, but I’d gladly take that than a dad who’s out of town on business, the dad who’s on the golf-course five days a week with clients and no time for his family. My father did not spend his time thinking about his own career, education, or “dreams”—he was fully invested in developing his family.
I can honestly say my dad was one of my closest friends in High School. I was never embarrassed to have him drop me off some where. Never ashamed to hang out with him at the movies or the mall.
He used to write me little notes before big games: “You can do it.” “I believe in you.” “You the man.” Little pieces of paper I still have in a box in my basement. He’ll never know how much those little pieces of paper meant. I get emotional just thinking about our game day breakfasts at a local joint, or our pre-game meal at Subway.
Anyways . . .
I called my dad on the drive from the airport Monday morning. Sure enough, at 2:54 a.m. he answered as he always does, “Respiratory--Phil Graves.” We talked about my trip, grad school, his upcoming adventure to Alaska (he’s going to camp by himself in the wilderness for two weeks).
To all the fathers out there: You don’t know what it means when a son knows he can call you at any hour of the day, knowing that for one brief moment, the person on the other end of the phone is your biggest fan and confidant.
To all the sons out there: You don’t know what it means when a dad knows that his son loves him so much, that the person he wants to talk to when he’s going on four hours sleep is…well…his dad.
My biggest fear in life is that I won’t be half the dad my father was. I am so engrossed in my education, plans, dreams, work, vocation, and opportunities . . . I pray I will honor Phil by being the encourager and man he was/is in my life.
I returned from Fresno late Sunday night (Monday morning) . . . well . . . late for me . . . 3 a.m. As I was driving from the airport home, I thought, there’s one person I can call right now that would not shoot me: my dad.
For the last twenty-plus years, my dad has worked the midnight shift at Children’s Hospital as a respiratory therapist. In fact, when I was younger, he worked two jobs—always the midnight shift.
I have many friends who lament that “my dad never made time for me” or “my dad was great with everyone except his own family.” I empathize with these people . . . but I cannot relate.
My father was always around. He was always there. Always present. Always willing to play catch, go for a jog, watch hoops, play one-on-one.
From seventh to twelfth grade he (nor my mom) never missed one sporting/church event. We played football, baseball, soccer, basketball and tennis and he was there for every single game. Of course, the post-game “Dad-nalysis” was part of the experience, but I’d gladly take that than a dad who’s out of town on business, the dad who’s on the golf-course five days a week with clients and no time for his family. My father did not spend his time thinking about his own career, education, or “dreams”—he was fully invested in developing his family.
I can honestly say my dad was one of my closest friends in High School. I was never embarrassed to have him drop me off some where. Never ashamed to hang out with him at the movies or the mall.
He used to write me little notes before big games: “You can do it.” “I believe in you.” “You the man.” Little pieces of paper I still have in a box in my basement. He’ll never know how much those little pieces of paper meant. I get emotional just thinking about our game day breakfasts at a local joint, or our pre-game meal at Subway.
Anyways . . .
I called my dad on the drive from the airport Monday morning. Sure enough, at 2:54 a.m. he answered as he always does, “Respiratory--Phil Graves.” We talked about my trip, grad school, his upcoming adventure to Alaska (he’s going to camp by himself in the wilderness for two weeks).
To all the fathers out there: You don’t know what it means when a son knows he can call you at any hour of the day, knowing that for one brief moment, the person on the other end of the phone is your biggest fan and confidant.
To all the sons out there: You don’t know what it means when a dad knows that his son loves him so much, that the person he wants to talk to when he’s going on four hours sleep is…well…his dad.
My biggest fear in life is that I won’t be half the dad my father was. I am so engrossed in my education, plans, dreams, work, vocation, and opportunities . . . I pray I will honor Phil by being the encourager and man he was/is in my life.
26 January 2008
Kwame
Seriously?
I can't believe Kwame Kilpatrick, mayor of Detroit, could be this incompetent. Not only is he in danger of prison time, he's not even capable of breaking the law in an effective manner.
2007 was the year of big political scandal--Republican or Democrat notwithstanding. It looks like 2008 will continue the same song; albeit...with a different verse.
He didn't learn from Nixon, Clinton, or Barry Bonds. America is one of the most forgiving nations in the history of the world. But...one has to confess. Instead, Kwame lied under oath (federal offense) and is now hiding out in his Florida villa (I don't even want to know how be purchased that home).
I love Detroit. I want to see it make a comeback. This kills me.
So, I'm pleading with you, Kwame.
Kwame...please come clean with it. Face your demons. Let the chips fall where they may. If you care about the city more than the little kingdom you've created...this is exactly what you'll do.
This isn't a black thing. This isn't a white thing. This isn't a left thing. This isn't a right thing.
This is about being a man and a leader.
I can't believe Kwame Kilpatrick, mayor of Detroit, could be this incompetent. Not only is he in danger of prison time, he's not even capable of breaking the law in an effective manner.
2007 was the year of big political scandal--Republican or Democrat notwithstanding. It looks like 2008 will continue the same song; albeit...with a different verse.
He didn't learn from Nixon, Clinton, or Barry Bonds. America is one of the most forgiving nations in the history of the world. But...one has to confess. Instead, Kwame lied under oath (federal offense) and is now hiding out in his Florida villa (I don't even want to know how be purchased that home).
I love Detroit. I want to see it make a comeback. This kills me.
So, I'm pleading with you, Kwame.
Kwame...please come clean with it. Face your demons. Let the chips fall where they may. If you care about the city more than the little kingdom you've created...this is exactly what you'll do.
This isn't a black thing. This isn't a white thing. This isn't a left thing. This isn't a right thing.
This is about being a man and a leader.
24 January 2008
Springsteen, Herod, and One Hot Preacher's Wife
. . . That just might be my favorite blog title to date.
If you want to have a thin-space moment (the British phrase for the times and places in our lives when heaven and earth kiss), listen to these three songs on Bruce Springsteen's LIVE IN DUBLIN: When the Saints Go Marching In, This Little Light of Mine (yes, you read that correctly), and We Shall Overcome.
The third verse of When the Saints goes like this: "When the new world is revealed . . . when the new world is revealed, oh when the new world is revealed. Lord, how I want to be there on that morning . . . when that new world is revealed."
-----------------
I just finished reading Eugene Peterson's THE JESUS WAY: A CONVERSATION ON THE WAYS THAT JESUS IS THE WAY. The last three chapters are vintage Peterson: He looks at the historical/biblical characters of Herod (and his counterpart: Essenes), Caiaphas (his counterpart: the Pharisee's), and Josephus (and his counterpart: the zealot's) in light of the spirituality Jesus embodied in his hown life. This completes his trilogy on "spiritual theology"--it's a must read for anyone who's interested in following Jesus in a world as complex as ours.
-----------------
The last three months has been a great time for family, friends, local church work, reading, writing (draft one of my first book, Jesus Feast, is complete!), and Sabbath Rest. Like all seasons, that time is now coming to an end.
Writing projects are intensifying, travel increases, and new church endeavors are just on the horizon. I feel rested and ready to see what God is up to in 2008. However, things are a changin'-- the next six months is going to be a great adventure: ZOE, DETROIT MISSION WEEK, TULSA WORKSHOP, TEACHING AT RC, TWO MAJOR WRITING PROJECTS, UGANDA TRIP, and LIPSCOMB SERMON SEMINAR, DOCTORAL WORK AT COLUMBIA--it all heats up now. Too bad the state I live in can't say the same.
I'm just glad I get to share the path with the most beautiful woman in the world.
Seriously, she's a hot preacher's wife.
If you want to have a thin-space moment (the British phrase for the times and places in our lives when heaven and earth kiss), listen to these three songs on Bruce Springsteen's LIVE IN DUBLIN: When the Saints Go Marching In, This Little Light of Mine (yes, you read that correctly), and We Shall Overcome.
The third verse of When the Saints goes like this: "When the new world is revealed . . . when the new world is revealed, oh when the new world is revealed. Lord, how I want to be there on that morning . . . when that new world is revealed."
-----------------
I just finished reading Eugene Peterson's THE JESUS WAY: A CONVERSATION ON THE WAYS THAT JESUS IS THE WAY. The last three chapters are vintage Peterson: He looks at the historical/biblical characters of Herod (and his counterpart: Essenes), Caiaphas (his counterpart: the Pharisee's), and Josephus (and his counterpart: the zealot's) in light of the spirituality Jesus embodied in his hown life. This completes his trilogy on "spiritual theology"--it's a must read for anyone who's interested in following Jesus in a world as complex as ours.
-----------------
The last three months has been a great time for family, friends, local church work, reading, writing (draft one of my first book, Jesus Feast, is complete!), and Sabbath Rest. Like all seasons, that time is now coming to an end.
Writing projects are intensifying, travel increases, and new church endeavors are just on the horizon. I feel rested and ready to see what God is up to in 2008. However, things are a changin'-- the next six months is going to be a great adventure: ZOE, DETROIT MISSION WEEK, TULSA WORKSHOP, TEACHING AT RC, TWO MAJOR WRITING PROJECTS, UGANDA TRIP, and LIPSCOMB SERMON SEMINAR, DOCTORAL WORK AT COLUMBIA--it all heats up now. Too bad the state I live in can't say the same.
I'm just glad I get to share the path with the most beautiful woman in the world.
Seriously, she's a hot preacher's wife.
21 January 2008
The Peculiar Institution
Slavery, as it came to be in the United States of America, was quite the "peculiar institution." Here lies the major place where preachers and theologians (both Northern and Southern) went wrong in their exegesis/hermeneutics (interpretation) per the Bible: Slavery in America was different than slavery in many ancient cultures (including Israel and Rome). Period.
The belief that God preferred America over all other nations (hence, many viewed America as the New Israel; Manifest Destiny)only complicated things. I'll save that discussion for another day.
The conviction that ancient slavery and modern American slavery are two completely different entities is true in (at least) three major ways.
First, slavery in America was for life. In most ancient cultures, slavery was a fixed sentence. In fact, in Israel's life, God makes his chosen nation release the slaves after a fixed period of time. In America however, once you were a slave it was virtually impossible to break out of the shackles that bound (save Frederick Douglas).
Second, slavery in America tore apart family systems. Marriages between slaves were not honored . . .children were torn apart from their mother's and father's as an afterthought. If you want to get a sense of the moral corruption this produces, read the Pulitzer Prize Winning novel, The Known World.
Third, slavery in America was primarily relegated to one race: Africans/Blacks. This is perhaps the greatest tragedy of Social/Religious life in America. This is what many "smooth" over, turning their privileged noses in apathy. The slave system that fueled southern life was based upon the belief that blacks were inferior to all whites. Blacks, in this epistemology, were non-human; animals despised by their superior counterparts.
The Civil War (and the Emancipation Proclamation) may have dealt with slavery but it did not . . . it could not . . . deal with the pervasive attitude that Blacks were an inferior being.
This is why Martin Luther King is such an important leader in American/World History. He reminded one of the greatest civilizations in the history of the world that her foundational documents declared every person equal under the eye of the all seeing God. He challenged America to live up the very ideals she dared to boast to the rest of the world. He called America to actually be who she thought she was: a land where all men and women are recognized as persons created in the image of God.
The question that keeps me up some nights: What will my children point out in thirty years, "Dad . . .how did you miss that? How did you not see God moving in that area . . . among those people?"
I'm told by many scholars today that there are more persons living in slavery (e.g. sex slavery in Asia) today then there were during just prior to America's bloody Civil War.
The belief that God preferred America over all other nations (hence, many viewed America as the New Israel; Manifest Destiny)only complicated things. I'll save that discussion for another day.
The conviction that ancient slavery and modern American slavery are two completely different entities is true in (at least) three major ways.
First, slavery in America was for life. In most ancient cultures, slavery was a fixed sentence. In fact, in Israel's life, God makes his chosen nation release the slaves after a fixed period of time. In America however, once you were a slave it was virtually impossible to break out of the shackles that bound (save Frederick Douglas).
Second, slavery in America tore apart family systems. Marriages between slaves were not honored . . .children were torn apart from their mother's and father's as an afterthought. If you want to get a sense of the moral corruption this produces, read the Pulitzer Prize Winning novel, The Known World.
Third, slavery in America was primarily relegated to one race: Africans/Blacks. This is perhaps the greatest tragedy of Social/Religious life in America. This is what many "smooth" over, turning their privileged noses in apathy. The slave system that fueled southern life was based upon the belief that blacks were inferior to all whites. Blacks, in this epistemology, were non-human; animals despised by their superior counterparts.
The Civil War (and the Emancipation Proclamation) may have dealt with slavery but it did not . . . it could not . . . deal with the pervasive attitude that Blacks were an inferior being.
This is why Martin Luther King is such an important leader in American/World History. He reminded one of the greatest civilizations in the history of the world that her foundational documents declared every person equal under the eye of the all seeing God. He challenged America to live up the very ideals she dared to boast to the rest of the world. He called America to actually be who she thought she was: a land where all men and women are recognized as persons created in the image of God.
The question that keeps me up some nights: What will my children point out in thirty years, "Dad . . .how did you miss that? How did you not see God moving in that area . . . among those people?"
I'm told by many scholars today that there are more persons living in slavery (e.g. sex slavery in Asia) today then there were during just prior to America's bloody Civil War.
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